We have seen this catchy phrase popping up all over but what does it actually mean and why should you care?
In my healing work, I have seen time and time again people really wanting to heal, going to hours of therapy and trying all kinds of different healing modalities, and yet they spin in circles.
I look at it this way- if you’re spinning in circles, what are you encircling? YOURSELF. Healing starts with you. The launching off point should be: why don’t I love myself? What are the messages I’ve received or things I have done that are causing that?
You may hear time and again, women and men saying “I didn’t know I was worthy of love.” What I have learned is we are born love, when we come into the world as a baby, we are stripped down to basics – feed me, change me, love me and I will grow.
Somewhere along the line that message is lost, unkind words, abuse, trauma, or loss and we start building a hard shell around ourselves to protect our hearts and our lack of love. The problem is when we get to a certain point in our development that hard shell has become a trap and all of those bad feelings are locked in it with us. We need to break free to let love in again and heal the pain.
So, here’s the catch: the way out of the pain is through it. Ugh. Why would you want to do that? Because, once you work through enough of it, you set yourself free and although life happens and more pain and trauma is certain to come, you turn and face it and it doesn’t stick and get trapped. You have to feel the feelings, this is called being congruent.
At the same time, you are busting out of your pain shell, you have to start little acts of kindness for yourself. Think of little things, buying an ice cream cone, swinging on a swing set, walking on the beach, reading a book for ten minutes, meditating and imagining yourself filling with love. What do you love to do? If you don’t know try some things on. This isn’t a contest, this is about healing your heart and learning to love yourself. You don’t get an A on this test. Start visualizing what you look like filled up with love.
The amazing part about learning to love yourself: it works. Go try it. Start today! You deserve love, you are love, you get to be loved.
Choose love always,
Peg
